With each passing day, she finds herself dying a little more than the day before. Slowly and steady, she withdraws from the rest of the world. The tears never roll down her face but she can always feel them stinging in her eyes. She's tougher than she's willing to admit but deep inside she is merely like a child scared and alone. She knows that a change will come soon and there is nothing she can do about it to make it better.
The more she wants to rest her eyes, they are less likely to close. It hurts to try to keep them shut for they are too alert at this time. A sadness clearly stained in her vision mirrors the turmoil of her thoughts.
She sits still in the corner of the sofa blanketed in the warmth of the sun coming through and sprawling across the room creating shadows darkening the living room. Her stare is void and blank as she looks ahead, but not focusing on anything in particular. Her sight is set on something inward within her thoughts as she hangs onto her memories; lethargic and reminiscent of what should have been in contrast to what is.
Sleep escapes her but now is when she wants it the most.
The sadness that engulfs her is more than she can bear and the sleep would stop the pain. Feelings of loneliness would dissipate if she could sleep. It would be the only time she can dream and in those dreams she would fine that solace and peace she seeks in the waking hours.
The more she blinks, her eye lids eventually begin to feel heavier. Intervals become shorter of them being open and her breathing shallow as it slows to a bare whisper of her breath. She welcomes the moment quietly as she feels the beating of her heart pounding against her chest.
"No more.." She whispers. "I don't want to feel any more."
Her head drops against the soft cushion of the sofa as her energy is depleted. All thought processes completely obliterated, her slumber will last until the body feels replenished. Nothing will wake her from the deep sleep as the world around her continues to move on.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
The jingling of keys are barely audible as the fingers holding them search for the one that will fit the door lock. Big burlesque hands gently push the door open as the tall figure stands in the entryway. Dropping the toolbox by the door, he shuts out the cold and turns to see her on the sofa. A small smile forms creating gentle wrinkles to form around his blue eyes. He walks over to the hearth and picks at the remaining logs from the last fire the night before.
Looking up at her once more, he decides to start another fire. As he begins to walk past her, he stops for a brief moment and with one finger slowly pulls back her hair from her eyes, and in doing so she slightly moves her head toward him as if she can feel his coolness from the tip of his finger. Not wanting to wake her, he continues to the back room for a couple of logs.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Slowly, she becomes aware that it feels warm; real warm in fact. Not wanting to open her eyes, she stretches her legs as she pushes back the blanket revealing the thin and pale silk camisole and shorts. They were a gift to her last Christmas and it's her favorite because of the soft feel it has.
It doesn't take more than a minute before she realizes she isn't alone. She can hear the crackling of the fire on the wood and knows who it is. She slowly smiles but still doesn't want to open her eyes for fear that it's not real. She had been waiting for so long; was so used to being alone.
The scent of coffee reaches her senses a few minutes later and she's tempted to open her eyes, but still holds back. Then she hears it; footsteps coming in her direction from the kitchen. Eyes closed, she raises her left brow as she wonders, "It can't be." She thinks. Hearing the soft thud of the cup being placed on the table she can barely wait anymore to open her soft brown eyes, yet she still refuses, even though that table is directly in front of her meaning that he is standing there.
"Lily." He whispers as her name easily rolls gently from his voice. "Lily." He repeats once more. Finally, a big smile breaks across her expression as she slowly opens her eyes to see him. She blinks several times to bring his face into focus. He's kneeling before her, one leg propped up to hold his arm that is resting. Afraid to speak first, she simply just looks at him as she etches his features into her memory. He's changed just a bit.
She can tell that he's freshly cleaned up from a shower because he's wearing the red turtle neck she bought him that was hanging in their closet. She had not packed that one for his trip.
Slowly pulling herself up to a sitting position, she feels a slight pain in her neck from the position she had slept in. He sees the pain cross her eyes for a fleeting moment and reaches out cupping her right side of the neck. As he massages it, he feels her molding herself into his hand even more.
Bringing her face to his to look directly into his blue eyes, she traces the wrinkles along the edge of his left eye with her fingertip. "Welcome home, baby. You made it just in time."
His eyes slowly brim a gentle storm of tears. "I know. " He gathered her then in his arms and carried her back upstairs to their king size bed. As he placed her down gently, he could feel that she was ready.
Picking up the phone next to the bed, he called the doctor knowing he would answer. "Hello?" "Doctor, this is the Richards home. It's time. She won't make it to the hospital." There was a slight pause and then the doctor said he was coming right away.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
He couldn't bring himself for some reason to be in the room with the doctor and the nurse. Instead, he kept pacing back and forth in the living room. The coffee he had made was all gone and a second one began. At this moment, he wished he was a drinker to calm down his nerves.
Being on that business trip proved to be beneficial but the distance it created between him and Lily was almost unbearable. He had been away before but not for six months. The call she made to him was done during a conference and the deal wasn't signed yet. At least now he knew it would create extra income he was going to need from this point forward.
Mark kept listening for what he expected but it seemed to take so long. He almost wanted to get over his nerves and go in there, but he knew that Lily had a habit of biting his head off. "No, I'll just be in the way." He reasoned with himself.
"Wa... Was that what I think it was?" He suddenly exclaimed. Halfway up the stairs he almost tripped as the nurse greeted him on her way down. She smiled at him. "You can come in now, silly man. You should have stayed." He ran past her and stopped at the door when he saw what the doctor was holding. "Well there young man, don't just stand there. Come here."
Mark slowly walked up to look into the face of the future. Extending his arms, the doctor placed the baby in Mark's. He nearly choked on his next words. "Welcome home, baby."
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Thru Libby's Eyes, ©
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